Overnight Underground News February 26 2020

It’s the Overnight Underground, here’s the headlines: The CDC and Wall Street says maybe it’s time to panic. Your 401k is wheezing from inside the quarantine. What do American’s want from political debates? (byte) Donald Trump is now a gay icon and Biden auditions for alzheimer’s. I’m John Ford and you’re tuned to The Overnight Underground News.

The stock market pandemic purge day two, infection boogaloo. The coronavirus, despite the fact that it hasn’t really wildly infected the US yet, has wiped out over one point seven trillion dollars in stock market value in just two days. The Dow was down nearly 900 points on Tuesday. Your 401k was last seen wearing a face mask, gasping for air and looking a little poorly. 

Speaking of the pandemic: The CDC is warning Americans that the likelihood of a coronavirus outbreak in the states is inevitable and everyone needs to be prepared. Oh, and they also said, “this might be bad.” CDC honchos also went on record that covid-19 will likely ‘become a global pandemic.” (byte) Good times, good times. All that being said, President Trump says we’re prepared for coronavirus here in Merca, (bite) Mitt Romney, says not so much. Romney told senior Trump administration officials Tuesday that the government is not adequately prepared for coronavirus and that the stock market killing plague may spread more widely in America. As of Tuesday, there were 53 confirmed cases in the US. You know, it’s a good thing Americans don’t have huge copays on healthcare that would prevent them from seeking treatment for cold-like symptoms.

Down under, covid-19 fears are creating panic over, Coke Zero and Diet Coke supplies. The Coca Cola corporation has gone on record in Australia that artificial sweeteners from China could be in shorter supply if the outbreak continues to spread. Australia goin’ all mad max with diet cola hoarding and who knows, maybe the next war will not be fought over oil, but aspartame. . 

The fun began even before the debates started Tuesday night. Joe Biden had a very senior moment in South Cackalackie when he told a crowd that he was a candidate for the Senate, not the Presidency. (byte)  Somebody needs to take grandpa Joe home, before this goes from mildly amusing to downright sad and embarrassing. 

Joe Biden says he’s a ‘candidate for US Senate’ in latest gaffe

If only being president didn’t involve public speaking. Joe Biden left jaws dropped at a major South Carolina Democratic event after he referred to himself as “a Democratic candidate for the United States Senate.” Speaking Monday evening at the “First in the South Dinner,” the presidential hopeful delivered remarks about returning the White House and the Senate to Democratic control before making the error.

Without going into a big song and dance about the Tuesday night train-wreck that was the  Democrat Debates in South Carolina, here’s the take-away. (byte) Everyone talking over each other, Bernie trying to talk back his commie past while the rest of the candidates painted a target on his back, orange man bad, free stuff and phony heartstrings for whichever voting tribe they are trying to pander to and oh yea, legal weed for everyone. Here’s one good zinger from the debate from Mayor Pete. (byte)

Trump gets the thumbs up to play gay anthems at his rallys. You betcha’, YMCA and Macho Man are back on the menu for Trump at his events, despite the fact that fans of the Village People had asked the group to block Trump from playing their catalogue. Trump just this week waddled his wide load to the stage as the loudspeakers played “Macho Man” at the rally in India. They really should have played Nacho Man. President Donald Trump, now a bonifide gay icon. And just to prove how macho our man in Washington is, Trump got into a pissing match with CNN’s Jim Acosta. (byte) What was it all about, who cares, it’s just fun to listen to the President and the media lose their shit. 

Village People gives Trump OK to play gay anthems ‘YMCA,’ ‘Macho Man’ at rallies

Village People, the American disco group behind the hits “YMCA,” “Macho Man” and “In the Navy,” has given the go-ahead for President Donald Trump to plays its songs at events, despite being “inundated” with requests from fans urging the band to block the president’s use of the music.

 The FCC received over one thousand complaints over this year’s SuperBowl, with most of the angry citizens upset over the halftime show. Quite a few of the complaints came from the Lone Star State, reports KVUE-TV. The angry citizens complained that the Jennifer Lopez and Shakira segments contained  “Extreme booty shaking,” “pole dancing” and “S&M outfits.” Well, it’s not like anyone tuned in to listen to their music anyway. In response to the complaints, next year’s halftime show will feature women in burkas performing Middle Eastern music.

‘We had to shield our children’s eyes’: Super Bowl halftime show with J.Lo, Shakira draws FCC complaints

DALLAS – “Extreme booty shaking,” “pole dancing” and “S&M outfits.” That’s how fans described this year’s Super Bowl LIV halftime show featuring performances by Jennifer Lopez and Shakira, according to the more than 1,300 complaints filed with the Federal Communications Commission in the hours following the Feb. 2 national broadcast.

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